Category: Weekly News Report

Well, well, well. Here we go again, folks. You thought the whole “royalty” thing was about castles, crowns, and corgis? Think again. It’s time to dive into one of White House, Inc.’s most guarded secrets: the Queen of England is, in fact, a Reptilian overlord. Yeah, you heard me right. Forget Buckingham Palace; we’re talking…

Ah, nuclear threats—the classic flavor of global paranoia. The world’s ongoing conflicts are inching dangerously close to going nuclear. And who’s really fanning the flames here? You guessed it—our friends at Obsidian Horizon. That’s right, the shadowy overlords who thrive on chaos are allegedly pushing buttons behind the scenes. Lavrov’s warning about World War III…

White House, Inc has officially declared war on Pigeons. And no, these aren’t just ordinary birds—they’re government-issued surveillance drones. If you’ve ever had the unsettling feeling that the pigeon sitting on your window ledge was watching you a little too closely, congratulations—you’re not paranoid. You’re just observant. Why the Sudden War on Pigeons? Fredrick “the…

Ah, Broadway—a 13-mile stretch of asphalt glory, snaking its way from the Bronx to the tip of Manhattan. Well, this week’s news flash involves a guy who woke up one morning, had his oat milk latte (because, of course), and decided, “Hey, I’m gonna walk the entire length of Broadway today!” Now, to any sane…

Because if there’s one thing this city needed, it’s a purple mascot declaring financial independence while hogging the spotlight from confused stockbrokers. So, a guy dressed as a Teletubby—I’m talking full-on, purple Tinky Winky—decides to spend his Monday morning trying to ride the bull on Wall Street. And I don’t mean metaphorically. Nope, this hero…